How to be found by Jesus

So many people "find Jesus"--myself, like the original disciples, I didnt choose Him--He choose me! I always tried to get away from Him! Like Yahweh choose the Jews--they didnt want to be chosen--they were always whoring after strange gods--been there, done that! Eventually I was dogged enough, and I had to give up! I accepted Jesus as my diksha guru (initiating spiritual master), and we have had a relationship since. At least, nobody can say He isn't a "living master". But I do not think much of the "authority' of the Bible--I think the Gospels are all made up stories and nobody knows anything of the actual life of Jesus Christ--that is yet to be written. There are maybe some hints in the Aquarian Gospel, but the real story may be quite different---there is a lot of magick in the Gospels--whoever wrote them must have really been "into" all that.